Upon entering our home, the little boy sheepishly asked his mother, “Why do they have their TV in a box? And why is it sitting on the floor?” They were honest questions, spoken with the innocence of an eight-year-old. The mother, cautious not to frighten her child, told him “Sweetie, it’s not in a …
The English language can be a savage beast. The vernacular of some words and phrases can leave a strikingly gruesome scar in the minds of others. (I oughta know, my use of adjectives & adverbs put my 7th grade English teacher in a coma for weeks!) For example, when I ask a buddy …
What the hell happened? Have I been asleep in a baclofen-induced coma? When did this change? And why didn’t anyone tell me? All my life I have been following the food groups pyramid featuring a solid foundation of breads & grains…followed by numerous servings of fruits & vegetables…a 3rd level …
Humanity–you should be ashamed! Hang your head as a million years of human evolution have been tossed in the garbage like a dirty paper towel. In case you missed it, “Watson,” a specially designed computer, opened a major can of Silicon Valley whoop-ass on the TV game show “Jeopardy.” …
This weekend is the crown jewel of American sporting events! The Tiffany competition between the two finest teams who have victoriously survived a long, grueling season of weekly battles. You know what game I am referring to. I don’t even need to tell you. And if I did say, I could be arrested, be …
Due to a complete case of writer’s block and lack of ideas, My Odd Sock is cleaning out the file of news items in this first edition of the…..”Almost Evening News.” Welcome to the Almost Evening News, I am My Odd Sock reporting with unworthy news stories you could care less about. …
G.N.P. stands for Gross National Product…and nothing proves that America has the grossest national products MORE than the catalog I received in the mail! Because within the 67 full-color pages…are examples of this country’s greatest works of ingenuity! As a kid I loved this stuff, usually found on the back …
The red carpet has been unfurled. Lawn chairs have been placed. And the winners are in. It’s time to announce the recipients of the 2010 My Odd Sock Flemmy Awards! The Flemmy Awards recognize excellence in buffoonery from the past year right here at My Odd Sock. (Note–there have been no signs …
My, how festive. Even the drain is decorated for the holidays! Let’s see what is rolling around in the ol’ brain case that needs to be let out like the family dog……. Hanky Panky When you think about it, the cloth handkerchief has to go down as the absolute worst …
Letting my fingers do the walking through the Yellow Pages of the phone book is a kick I’ve enjoyed for many years. It’s a fun way to kill some time when you have a moment. Maybe it’s my background in advertising that draws me to gander at the ads. Or, maybe it’s my fascination …
