Rants

 

This pitiful blog serves as my outlet.

A place to spew my thoughts, my gripes & ideas in a somewhat humorous way.

Not everything will be on point as my mind hits & skips like a ’74 Dodge Dart.

Today is no exception as I drone on about two subjects in this post titled “Rants.”

Enjoy.

 

Laziness

We’re getting lazy, we are.  We have groceries delivered.  Our take-out food.  We shop from home.  And pay bills online.  Heck, we can even buy a car from a giant vending machine if we want.

This laziness has taken over how we dress too.

The clothing company Untuckit was born, hawking a whole line of shirts to be worn “untucked.”

Gone are the days of being prim & proper.

Now it’s just let it all hang out.  Untucked.  

So everyone can see my hairy gut when I reach above my head.  Yeah, that’s a good look…putting a too short dress shirt on a Sasquatch.

Wear a real shirt and tuck that shit in your pants!

It gets even worse as now Skechers has introduced its new hands-free Slip-in shoes.

“No bending over” which is great if you are disabled or have back problems, but otherwise, it’s just another excuse not to toes your toes.

Sure, let’s avoid ANY form of physical exertion.

Because putting on shoes has become such a burden.

By wearing Skechers “hands-free slip-in shoes,” you skip the embarrassment of bending over causing your Untuckit shirt to ride up in the back exposing the crack of your ass for all to see.

Where does this laziness end?

What’s next…pants you don’t need to zip?  We already have those…they’re called sweats!

Here are a couple of print ad ideas for sweat pants…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Next,

My Haircut

Got my haircut last week.  Had the same stylist who has cut my hair numerous times before.

I had my usual #4 on the sides & back, inch off the top, round the neck & just thin the side burns.

Except I forgot to mention the side burns (and she didn’t ask me).

We were chit-chatting so I wasn’t paying attention.

When I got back to my car I glanced in the rear-view mirror and saw this…

My burns were gone!

Cut at least an inch above my ears!

WTF?

I wanted a haircut…not report for boot camp!

 

 

I looked like one of those idiots marching in Charlottesville.

Was this place “Great Clips” or “Great Chops?”

By chance was your razor made by Toro?

I wanted my ‘usual,’ not something to make my face look even BIGGER!

The water wasn’t that high in Florida after the hurricane, for Christ sake.

I look like I am either Amish or a member of the Proud Boys.

Yes, it was my fault.  I should have reminded her how I like my side burns.  But then again, she should have asked before going at me like Edwina Scissorhands.

Next time, I’ll remember.

That’s it.  My rants have aired & the tension has gone.  May you be well.