It’s the Flemmy Awards!

Welcome ladies & gentlemen to the Flemmy’s, celebrating the best & worst of My Odd Sock.

We are live from the American Legion hall in Sheboygan for this star-studded event.

 

 

Everyone in attendance hoping, dreaming to take home a coveted, career-killing Flemmy Award!

The winners are in.  Trophies have been polished.  And 50/50 tickets have been sold.

So let’s kick off…The Flemmy Awards!

 

Our first category:

 

Wow, this was a close one.

So many deserving posts honoring multiple sclerosis–but only one deserves a Flemmy.

And the winner of “Best MS Post” is…

 

“Crying in a Field,” where I found myself boo-hooing at the gravesite of my dead parents.

Writer- My Odd Sock.  Director-My Odd Sock.  Runny Nose- My Odd Sock.

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Next we have:

 

Shuffling through SO MANY unfunny entries here, the Flemmy winner of “Best Humor Post” goes to…

 

 

 

“Razor Burn,” is a post describing a new body shaver for men.  This essay confirms guys are so gross it’s no wonder there are lesbians.

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Grab your camera because it’s time for:

 

This year’s Flemmy for “Best Photo” honors my rudimentary editing skills using Microsoft Paint.

And the winner for “Best Photo” is…

 

 

“Peealots” from the post “Pop Quiz.”

This parody of a popular kid’s toy explains why I often have a wet nappie.

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We got gore!:

 

“Best Blood Scene” was a hands-down, no-contest winner!

 

 

 

 

This picture from the post “Wild West” recreates my day at a cowboy show.

Critics raved this as being “O positive.”

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And a little sex:

 

 

The Flemmy winner of “Too Too Much Information” goes to…

 

 

 

“In the Buff” describes my attempt at better health/sleep by dozing in the nude.

Not yet certain of the results, but just keep the curtains closed, loser.

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Some Say Less is More:

 

The post with the “Fewest Words” was also a close race.

But coming at just 93 words was the winner…

 

 

“Texting MS,” about me having a quick text bitch-session with multiple sclerosis.

Not only did “Texting MS” have the fewest words–but NO comments either, so a winner on both accounts.

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Talking Trash:

 

 

So many jokes…but only one Flemmy!

Therefore, the winner of the “Dumbest Joke from the Dumpster” goes to…

 

 

Clerk-  “Need a bag for that?”

Me-  “No, I’ll wear it.”

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Our next award is:

 

Ooo, this Flemmy is painful.

The winner of “Dork from Young Age” goes to…

 

 

 

A young Doug as a ventriloquist.

Dummy #1-  Me

Dummy #2-  Danny O’Day

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But it doesn’t stop there:

 

How does one break this vicious cycle?

As I have apparently also won the Flemmy for “Still Dork at Middle Age.”

 

 

And the winner is…

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Thank goodness, the final Flemmy:

 

Our final Flemmy of the evening is for “Typical Reader Response”

(How does one react to My Odd Sock)

And the winner is…

WE HAVE A TIE!

 

 

 

 

 

One can only hope My Odd Sock gets better from this day forward.

Here’s to reaching for your best.  Thanks for reading!