I’m Sorry

I’m Sorry

The dribble begins.

 

I apologize.  A lot.

Sometimes I blame my quick expression of regret on my lack of self-confidence.  

I probably screwed something up, so it is just easier to apologize, accept the blame & move on…..till the next goof-up (‘cuz there will be more!).

 

But other times I blame multiple sclerosis for my short comings.

Plans change because I need an assist.  More time.  Or I can’t do it at all.

I’m sorry for feeling I could be a better person, husband, father & provider had MS not detoured my life.

Those in my circle are understanding and accomodating to my situation.  Yet, I still have bitterness towards my inability to participate.  To lend a hand.  To be present.

And for that, I’m sorry.

Because I walk slower, drive slower, think slower–people are always behind me.

Thus, I’m sorry for holding you up.

I do what I can.  I wish I could do more, but it’s all I got.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry to bother you to repeat what you said.  Or me, retelling a story I told the day before.

Sorry I dress like a slob as I try to avoid buttons, snaps & zippers.

I’m sorry for still thinking this way after 25 years living with multiple sclerosis.  But I’ve long said MS plays on one’s mind as much as it does with one’s body.  (I’m proof to that.)

 

Suck it up, Nancy!

 

My whining reminds me of an old joke…….

Q-  What’s in this picture?

A-  The world’s smallest violin playing just for me.

 

 

And mostly I’m sorry to you for being my sounding board of random thoughts & disjointed writing.

Every so often one needs to let off some steam–and you are cheaper than a therapy session!

Keep moving.

10 Replies to “I’m Sorry”

  1. Cheaper and way less “results” driven than a therapist.

    That one hit home (don’t be sorry)
    Writing it down may be therapy for you, but it’s therapy for your readers too. Thank you.

    1. Ben,
      No, thank YOU for reminding me I am not alone. Best to you, sir. Thank you for reading.

  2. I feel the same Doug after 41 years and I don’t think I’ll ever change. If I’m not apologizing for something I’m thinking about it. Gotta keep going but you definitely hit the nail on the head. Thanks for spouting off it made me feel better ❤️

    1. Joanne,
      I appreciate your kind words. Take it one day at a time being the best you can be (Sorry Army for using your tagline!). Make today a good one!

    1. Tina,
      Next time we are together we can have an “Apology Contest.” Winner gets a basket of guilt.
      Always good hearing your side–thank you.

  5. Saying “I’m sorry” is an automatic reaction. I find myself over-apologizing for things I have no control of, like asking for help. Before saying sorry, I stop and try to ask myself “Have I actually done anything wrong ?”. If the answer is no, I try not to apologize, but I always say please and thank you.

    1. Margaret,
      Excellent advice! Thank you for “classing up” this otherwise worthless blog.
      Best to you.