The Nose Have It

 

During the pandemic I have found a new calling.

An interest.  A hobby.  Almost an obsession.

You see during these mask-wearing, difficult times I have become preoccupied by the nose.

And the seemingly difficult time some have of keeping their nose snuggled within their mask, in particular.

 

I’ve never had that problem.

Maybe it’s because I wear a mask that fits.

Or that I wear the mask properly.

 

Or maybe I don’t have trouble because my nose is the size of a Boeing.

Whatever the reason, I am hooked (eh, poor word choice) on watching others try, or not try, to keep their nasal nip-slip to a minimum.

 

My pick (another bad word choice) for those who have the most trouble with their masks are on television.

News reports, sport interviews…they’ll be yakking away as their mask begins to slip lower and lower…and lower on their nose.  Almost to the point of falling off before they pull it up.

 

Still talking, their mask begins to droop again.

Lower….Lower…And lower.

I find myself sitting on the edge of my seat, shouting at the TV…

“Pull it up!  Pull it UP!  IT’S GONNA BLOW!”  (dang I did it again)

I don’t hear a word of what they say because I am so fixated on watching their mask slip faster than a California mudslide.

It happens to me EVERY damn time.

 

I realize my new calling is just a temporary thing.  We won’t be wearing masks forever.  Certainly better days are ahead.

But till that time comes I’ll continue with my fascination of watching for sneaky sniffers.

And I’ll continue to remind you to keep your mask on.  Nose covered.

Gotta run (again with the wrong word).