Worst Gifts
Birthdays. Holidays. Wedding day. Valentines day. Just because day.
ANY day is special to give or receive a gift. Am I right?
Problem is not all gifts are as special as they seem.
Some are downright lame. And I have given & gotten more than my share through the years.
Here are some examples…
Shake Weight
Yes, the infamous Shake Weight. The popular exercise gadget from years back.
I got one in a gift exchange–and haven’t used it since.
Sits around collecting dust. Probably like yours if you own one.
As you may know I like to exercise. Just not with a Shake Weight.
The arm motions remind me too much of my teenage years.
Backpack
I received this awesome backpack as a gift several years ago. Sweet design. Roomy. Well-made.
But, but…the thing is–I barely walk. The longest trek I make is to the bathroom. I thought it was a joke and laughed when I opened it. I am always appreciative of gifts given to me but this made no sense.
Giving me a backpack is like giving a stereo to a deaf person. Giving Omaha Steaks to a vegan. Giving a shirt to a nudist!
Geez, let’s move on.
Umbrella
I have given my share of bad gifts as well.
This one is probably the worst.
I gave this fine, Ohio State hat umbrella to my wife when we were dating thirty-some years ago.
It hasn’t been seen in public since. Nor has it shielded a head from a single drop of rain. But I have been doused–soaked–flooded with good-natured ridicule ever since.
Well at least the thought was there!
Pandora
Pandora. The new, glorified (EXPENSIVE) charm bracelet.
It’s a scam in my book. And I refused to submit to the popular pressure.
“Aren’t you getting your wife a Pandora bracelet?” asked my sister-in-law. Her own wrist adorned with a Pandora that had more metal than a snow chain on an Impala.
“Hell no” I said. “They put flimsier handcuffs on convicts.”
So she bought one for my wife. A couple years later, I gave in and purchased one small, tiny, miniscule charm for this silly bracelet. Never again.
Fifty bucks! I couldn’t believe it. I have more metal in a filling!
That’s why I call it a scam—the Pandora scam. Worst gift ever.
Candles
Finally, candles make popular gifts…AND fire hazards.
Must be popular because Yankee Candle has a whole store devoted to them, candles…as well as arsonists.
I got this one in a gift exchange. Watermelon Lemonade.
If I want Watermelon Lemonade, I’ll drink a glass of Watermelon Lemonade, not light a candle scented of Watermelon Lemonade.
But when I accidently torch the family room curtains at least the smoke will smell like Watermelon Lemonade.
Did you know candles are the second leading cause of household fires? That’s just behind the #1 cause—pyromaniacs!
Candles aren’t decorative gifts—they are an accelerant.
Might as well just give me a can of gas & a lighter.
Same thing…minus the smell of Watermelon Lemonade.
What is the worst gift you have ever received? Please tell us in a comment. Or you could save it and put my name on it for next year’s gift exchange.
Just save the receipt.
6 Replies to “Worst Gifts”
2 different years & 2 different gifters. Re-gifted candles! Both gifters were smokers & I’m not, so I knew they had been sitting out since they got them last year. Oh well,, you know what “they” say; it’s the thought that counts.
Marykay,
Thank you so much for visiting & commenting!
Re-gifted candles?…let’s hope the wicks weren’t burnt. Better luck next year!
The worst gift for me is an umbrella! How does one think you can carry this with a walker or on a scooter. Both hands (busy) I guess if you don’t have MS, it’s not understood? People think they’re helping, BUT, they’re not. Thanks for trying 😊
Joanne,
Darn it, I was going to send you the OSU umbrella we don’t use.
Maybe you could get one of those umbrella hats you wear on your head? Fashionable AND functional. Thanks for commenting as always!
The worst gift I ever remember receiving was about 30 years ago. I was at a fundraising dinner and in a raffle won a gift certificate to a “Blockbuster type” video store. The problem was I did not own a VCR. I just re-gifted it to someone else at my table.
I guess I’ve been pretty lucky in the receiving gifts department.
I don’t want to brag, but I am an excellent gift giver. Hopefully you will choose me at your next gift exchange. 🙂
Margaret,
So you are an excellent gift giver, huh? Well, I’ll be sending you my list complete with sizes, colors & preferences. Thanks for your two-cents. Greatly appreciated!