Aim Of Throne

 

 

 

 

Multiple sclerosis does wicked things to a person’s psyche, confidence & soul.

 

The following is a dramatic account of one such event.

 

 

The parties involved include:

 

The toilet.

 

 

 

 

The floor.

 

 

 

 

 

And me, aka My Odd Sock.

 

 

 

It was the middle of the night.  Even the crickets were asleep.

I rolled over only to realize my bladder was full.

Brimming, in fact.

Dragging myself out of bed, I slowly shuffled down the hall.

“God, I hope I make it.”

This was bad.  Each step was either one step closer to relief…or disaster.

Dribbling began as I felt the cool bathroom floor beneath my feet.  So close now.

I gripped myself to dam the dike.

Only problem now was releasing the grip of my hand to lower my briefs.

Taking a breath I let go in one fell swoop, lowered my drawers & squatted onto where I thought was the toilet.

Well I was wrong.

Landing on the floor my arm swiped at the tub wall sending shampoo bottles scattering.

“Are you okay?” my wife called.

“I’m fine.”  

I lied.

Truth was my bladder burst like the water show at the Bellagio.  My legs straightened, tightening as spasticity reared its ugly head.

 

 

I pulled the underwear loose from my ankles to cover my privates hoping to soak up some of the you-know-what.

 

 

 

 

Rolling to the right I was unable to bend my legs.

Moving to the left was no better.  My legs were no help being stiff as steel.

 

 

 

Meanwhile my bare-ass skidded & skated on the floor like baby oil on a teflon pan.

I couldn’t buy friction.

I rolled & tumbled trying to get up & back to the toilet but the urine Slip-N-Slide had other ideas.

 

Defeated, exhausted and wet, I raised the white flag and called for help.

My wife & son came to the rescue.

That’s when MS’s embarrassment & humiliation kicked in.  A grown man lying in his own pee unable to move.

To say MS sucks is putting it mildly.  I have more graphic terms to describe it so I’ll spare you from my potty-mouth.

My struggle from the other night is proof multiple sclerosis not only hurts physically, but often is a painful punch to the ego.

Be careful my friends.  Let’s hope tonight is restful.