Things Happen For A Reason
Bullsh##!
And the next time I hear someone say that, I may just scream like a girl at a Justin Bieber concert.
Because you wouldn’t say “things happen for a reason” had you attended the same funeral for a 20 year old young man that I did recently.
I still shake my head in disbelief.
His life was too short. And the future before him…richly long.
He was riding the roller coaster of life. But he only got to ride up to the top of the first hill before he was told to exit to the right. His ride was over.
Sometimes I wonder if my MS happened for a reason. A signal tapping me on the shoulder to say a change needed to be made.
You see, for twenty years, I had a 2 1/2 to 3 hour commute each day, gone from 6:30am to 6:30pm, in a deadline driven environment. Sometimes I wonder if I would have gotten MS had I had a different job. I should have called the Psychic Network!
After a decade & a half with MS as my doubles partner, I can honestly say multiple sclerosis has encouraged me to enjoy each day. It opened my eyes & ears to new sights and sounds. To welcome new adventures, to slow down, breathe deep…and park closer to the front door!
I’ve learned to be more easy going. More patient. A better partner to my wife and parent to my kids. In fact, I…
Hear that clanging? Yep, I just had a thought.
For rolling around in my big, empty head was a glimmer of an idea.
Was the death of the young man meant to inspire up to be better people? Better parents? Better brothers?
Was his young life taken in order to draw us together? To do the right thing? Make the better choice?
Hmm, that storyline sounds vaguely familiar of another guy who died a little over two thousand years ago.
Let me ask you, do you view your MS as something that happened for a reason? Or do you see MS, or any life-changing disease, as simply snake-eyes in the crap shoot of life?
Is there any truth to the whole “things happen for a reason” theory? Or is it a bunch of psycho-babble used to offer some explanation/comfort of an unfortunate experience?
Let me know what you think…and I promise not to scream.
8 Replies to “Things Happen For A Reason”
Nope, don’t view MS as happening for a reason. If it did, I couldn’t figure out the reason, so I stopped trying. Lot’s of things in life make no sense to me whatsoever, like that young man dying…what’s the reason? And if there is anyone making those decisions…you know, the almighty, then I beg to differ with his reasoning.
Cheers
Yes I do believe things happen for a reason and I thank god for all my unanswered prayers. Life is about choices not about what I get or what happens to me. The choice comes from how I choose to react to whatever life brings my way, it’s the only thing I’m truly in control of anyway.
Okay, I hope not to make you scream, but you did ask to hear from your readers. I wrote extensively about this topic in the comments section of one of my daily blog poems about MS. Here’s the poem.
Here is a pet peeve.
When people say they are glad
that they got MS.
They are pleased because
it made them better persons.
My blood just curdles.
Are you kidding me?
Was there no better method
to accomplish growth?
The extensive comments and my response can be found at the link:
http://lapazconvos.blogspot.com/2011/01/pet-peeve.html
Act I Scene V: There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
Ahh, if only we knew the reason….
I personally do believe that things happen for a reason. Honestly, it doesn’t matter if they do, or if they don’t. What people facing adversity need to realize (in my humble opinion) is that there is very little, outside of ourselves, that we have control over. Many things (like MS) just happen and we know of no way to stop it from happening to us. Absolutely the ONLY thing we CAN control is how we react to it. Self pity and bitterness (“Why me?” syndrome) accomplish absolutely nothing. Taking stock of what we still CAN do and living our lives to the fullest extent possible (and, yes, changing ourselves for the better) will all enrich our lives. Ask Steven Hawking or Christopher Reeve (when he was alive) if things happen for a reason and if their conditions had any positive effects. I think I have a good idea what their answers would be. I don’t like what MS has done to my body and mind any more than anyone else, but I do know that, if it weren’t for that huge wake up call, I wouldn’t be the person I am today and I wouldn’t change a thing because I love the person that i am. My apologies for the long winded speech (typing session).
Until the moment I read this, the disease seemed pointless. Then I viewed the revelatory photo of Odd Sock beturbaned and gazing into a snow globe. I could not stop laughing for five full minutes–more than enough time to become a believer that all my sufferings were prelude to that perfect comedic moment.
Long before “The Beaver,” there was Odd Sock. You are a genius, Doug, seriously. Sock on!
I read the obit in the paper and I also wondered why your nephew died so young. I was a great young man, did all the right things, had a bright future in front of him and still….
I don’t think things “happen for a reason”. I think, they happen and we try to find a reason whether good or bad. It is what you make of it.
Im 31 and was diagnosed with MS 3 weeks ago. I have to say that I too believe it was for a reason. I’ll be damned if I know what that reason is…but I’m sure there is one. Perhaps it’s to teach me it’s ok to ask for help…which I hate as much as liver and onions, maybe it’s to teach me patience (a virtue that is not mine), or maybe I just pulled the cosmic short straw… Either way I have to believe that by my having this disease I’m going to be able to positively change someone elses life… Because if that wasn’t possible, what would the point be?